Tuesday, November 13, 2007

When the Routine Bites Hard

Hi kids. It's time for round two of the meme tonight. Man, I'm glad I have it to do, because I haven't done shit to blog about in the last couple of days.

10. What are the things your friends count on you for?

I'm sure that all my friends know I would do pretty much anything for them. Aside from that, they can count on me to make them crazy mix CD's, feed them whenever they'll let me, get pissed off at any assholes who dare to give them grief (which includes creative ways to curse the assholes and imagine bad things befalling them). I've already given almost all of my friends a dork-ass theme song and I'll sing it for them on command. I'm pretty sure my friend K. counts on me to make a fool of myself and jumping to it, anytime she commands me to make my downs syndrome face in front of all of our guy friends.

This is my first real live boyfriend, Neal wearing the corpy uniform we all had to wear.

11. What is the best part of being in a committed relationship?

My first thought, being on the outside looking in, is getting laid on a regular basis. Wait. What is this, how you say...committed relationship? No, really. I've been in a few of those, but only one healthy one and that was my first boyfriend Neal. I think the best part about it for me, was having a best friend who I knew always had my back and had seen me at my very worst both looks wise and behavior wise and he still loved me and knew when to make me laugh and when to give me space.

I remember once after we had been together for 2 1/2 years, I was working two jobs. I didn't get home from my one job until after midnight and was supposed to be at my next job by 6 am. I overslept and when I woke up and realized it, I threw myself one of those, "I hate my life" fits - complete with foot stomping. I then ran to my job and when I saw Neal again later that day, I was all sheepish and asked him how scared he was of me. He said, he thought it was great since normally I seemed so perfect. He meant it too. All I could think was that he had to be either totally insane or totally in love with me. I don't think anyone else who knows me, would ever describe me as perfect.

12. What is the hardest part of being in a committed relationship?

Finding one that doesn't suck.

13. Summer or Winter? Why?

I'm a Summer girl. I grew up in Arizona. Heat, for the most part, doesn't bother me. I hate being cold. I do, however like the change of seasons, but with my ADD, I just like the beginning of the seasons. I really only want them to last a month or two. See what you can do about that, will you?

14. Have you ever been in a school-yard fight? Why and what happened?

No, thank god. I'm a runner, not a fighter. I'm also a terrible smart ass, so anywhere I've lived, it seems the toughest and most ethnic chick in my school has wanted to kick my ass. I'm not proud. I freely admit to hiding and running home from school to avoid getting soundly whupped.

15. Why blog?

Duh, because I don't have a life. Really, I started blogging as a way to make me write every day and to not feel like I was writing in a vacuum.

My family back before anyone had heard of the HIV. Of course, I'm the ragamuffin in front with one shoe on and one shoe off. Maybe I'm projecting, but I always think my mom looks so tired in this photo.

16. Did you learn about sex, and/or sex safety from your parents?

Um, my mom tried. She died in 1975, and back then there was no AIDS, so there was never any talk of safer sex. My mom did say that we should feel free to ask her anything, since her mom was so uncomfortable talking about it and so my mother had to learn from friends. Apparently, her friends didn't know shit, because once I asked my mom what a blow job was, and she honestly had no idea.

17. How do you plan to talk to your kids about sex and/or sex safety?

I've been talking to my daughters about it since Stinky was five and asked me what "gay" meant. When I worked in the clinic, I saw enough pregnant 12 year olds, to make me want to educate my girls in any way I could. We don't just talk about mechanics, we discuss power issues and emotions too. So far, they have been very open with me about boys and kissing and whenever a big group of their friends are over, getting ready to go out I say, "Don't have sex," before they leave. I'm usually answered with a big chorus of, "Gross!" It's funny every single time.

18. What are you most thankful for this year?

These two chuckleheads are what I'm most thankful for. Look at them? Who wouldn't be?...Don't answer that. I'm thankful we're all healthy and happy and functionally sane. And as I've tried to say on here as often as possible, I'm thankful for my kick-ass friends and family. I am a firm believer in appreciating the hell out of people while they're around, because you never know when they won't be.


Ice said...

Amen sister, Amen!
You've got your priorities in the right place.

Tara said...

I fell in love with Arizona when I first visited several years ago. Two of my brothers live out near Phoenix, so I've had many opportunities to visit that state. Love it, love it, love it. That heat is wonderful if one spends most of their lives in colder weather.

Not Fainthearted said...


thank you for this.

Margaret said...

must remember that "don't have sex line", sometimes "BEHAVE" just doesn't cover it

michi said...

Lol, my roommate in college used to say, "Now don't do anything I wouldn't do." Then she'd pause and finish with, "...which leaves you room for a lot." But I guess a mother shouldn't really say that to her kids, heheheh.
That's an ADORABLE picture of your girls by the way! They're so cute!
Whatever happened to that first boyfriend?

Gyuss Baaltar said...

I think I need one of those mix CD's.

The Lady Who Doesn't Lunch: said...

My mom said the same thing about blow jobs but I think she was lying. Otherwise she was pretty honest about stuff and answered me whenever I had a question. I was the only kid at school who knew the proper names for all the parts and didn't say "peanut" or "hoo-hoo".
Some of the kids thought I was lying.

Killer said...

You're making me want to have kids and I don't appreciate that one bit.

Mrs. Big Hairy Woman said...

Loved those answers.. very honest and quite humble.. Ewxcellent post.. I was starting to get all choked up...until I read about the part about the "blow job".. that cracked me up....

laura b. said...

Excellent post again, Champ! That is a good looking boyfriend, that Neal...yeah, what happened to him?

evil-e said...

about #11: as a female friend of mine commented when I started going out with Renee.."regular sex is a good thing". These were some sage words.

about #12: amen..I waited for years for a relationship that did not suck.

good answers to some interesting questions...I read yesterday's but did not comment..too tired.

minijonb said...

wait... was that a Joy Division reference in the title? that's brilliant!


Churlita said...


Thanks. I don't always hear that from people.


I haven't been there since the late eighties. I bet I wouldn't even recognize it.


Thank you for the thought provoking questions.


You have to start being way more specific when they get older.


We were 19 when we first started dating, and so neither one of us knew what we were doing and we made all of our mistakes on each other. Basically, I broke up with him because I was 22 and finally ready to settle down and go back to school and he was still moving somewhere else every 6 months.


Anytime. Tell me what kind of music you like. I have pretty much anything you can imagine.


I wonder if she just wasn't familiar with the term. I can't imagine not knowing what the act was.


Sorry, but it is really fun to embarrass teenagers.


I'll refrain from making the obvious "choked up" and blow job joke there.

Laura B.,

I know. I wonder what he looks like now. See my answer to Michi.


Thanks for the comment tonight. I totally understand being too tired.


Yup. You called it.