Tuesday, June 12, 2007

And I'm Burnin', I'm Burnin', I'm Burnin' for You

Remember how I said I went out and took photos on Sunday? Well, obviously I didn't get too far away from home, because most of them are of my garden.

I've been on the sleep deprived side lately. It's all my fault, because I spend a lot of time dicking around and then it gets late and I have to do my real chores and then I don't get to sleep until very much later and wonder why I'm all cranky and my eyes feel so dry and I look ninety years old the next day. It's just plain D-U-M, but it looks like I'm doing it again tonight.

Soooo, it's all leading to another weak excuse for doing a short, random post. It's a good thing I'm here to make up all these excuses, or else I'd really seem lame. This is the part of the post where I throw out the loose change and you all can bend over and pick it up.

First, I'm going to share with you the very best Google search that ever landed someone on my blog. I'm not putting it on here for you all to feel jealous, I just think you'll want to see it too. Ready? Okay:

"dubuque white girls who want you to call then come over and give them sex right now"

How awesome is that? I know, It's totally tits. And because I also know you're as curious as I was, I checked the search myself to see if the poor schlub was able to find what he wanted on the internets. Unfortunately, the closest I could find to a site that offered up Dubuque white girls who wanted you to come over and give them sex right now, was a page that promised to show me pierced girl parts. Not really the same thing, is it?

The last randomness I will expose you to tonight are some overheards. The first one I caught when I was at the Dublin Underground during Arts Fest:

"If you were real lesbians, you'd be out listening to The Roches right now..."

The second one I heard quite by accident while walking down the hall at work:

"The cream stopped the itching, but didn't really help the burning so much..." At that point, I had to put my hands over my ears, shake my head back and forth and say, "Watermelon, watermelon, watermelon" as many times as it took before they stopped speaking. I did feel a little better later, after I found out they were talking about treating someone's poison ivy.

17 comments:

Mr Atrocity said...

"Poison Ivy" eh? Sounds like a euphemism if ever I heard one.

notfainthearted said...

For the record, I'm loving the random posts.

The search thing is H.I.Larious

Babybull40 said...

That is so funny... That is what happens when you only hear part of a conversation... I would have thought the worst too.. watermelon please.....Love the pic of your flowers...I can't help it.. I'm a garden freak...lol

Poptart said...

Ok seriously, HOW did that search lead to your blog? No way!! I love google.

The best would be if that person becomes a regular reader and posts comments and shit.

Tara said...

I also love the random posts. It's like a 5lb bag of mixed candy. ;)

One time while walking past my mailman who was talking to some other people, I heard him say he knows where to get a stun gun at a discount. Hm.

Rachel said...

Devon got poison Satsuma (whatever that is) while we were camping. It is on his back and his face. Poor chap.
As for google searches most of my consist of people looking for photos of people that i have posted on my Hump Day Hottie feature.
BORING!

booda baby said...

It'd be nice if you could hook up whoever's looking for dubuque white girls with the itch-solving cream. There's a need just WAITING to happen.

dmarks said...

""The cream stopped the itching, but didn't really help the burning so much..."

Too much information! Almost as bad as overhearing in a dorm hallway a description of a "romantic" encounter in which both participants were covered in shaving creme.

l.b. said...

Random posts are the best! Not much in the world is more random than blogging anyway.
I think sometimes overhearing bits of a conversation is soooo much more interesting than the actual conversation. The version in your imagination is bound to be better than the actual back and forth inanities.

evil-e said...

I used to run with the artist crowd (I am one sort of)and those quotes do not surprise me a bit.

I wonder if I can search using Cleveland instead of Dubuque??

Margaret said...

kumkwat, kumkwat, kumkwat doesn't work nearly as well as watermelon

Churlita said...

Mr Atrocity,

I'm happy to pretend that poison ivy is just poison ivy.

Not,

Thanks.

Babybull40,

Yea for garden freaks.

Poptart,

I think because I wrote about Dubuque once and called myself a white girl.

Tara,

Be careful of your mailman.

Rachel,

Poor Devon.

Booda Baby,

Ew. I never quite put the two together before.

Dmarks,

Shaving cream?

LB,

I agree.

Evil-E,

Let me know how your search works out.

Margaret,

It's those hard consonants that throw you off.

AlienCG said...

The overheard things can usually be the funniest things. Remember, the second one could have also been about athletes foot. Who are the Roches?

I haven't looked at the search terms that have brought people to my site, but with Evil-E there, it should be interesting.

Brando said...

Just LOL at the whole post. And I love that you said "It's totally tits."

Churlita said...

Aliencg,

The Roches are group of women who sing. They are on a lot movie soundtracks and they sang at a concert in the town where I live.

Brando,

Thanks.

Killer said...

Now you have left me with two unanswered questions:

Where do you find dubuque white girls who want you to call then come over and give them sex right now?

and

What stopped both the itching AND burning?

Churlita said...

Killer,

Sometimes it's just better not to know.