Monday, March 31, 2008

My Left Brain Knows That All Love is Fleeting

Hey, what say we talk about boys tonight? Okay, don't mind if I do. I know I've said it over and over, but this town is sick with boys. I'm sure it's not all that different than your town that way, but if you're a girl you can find almost any level of attention you want from men here. If you want a relationship, however, you'll have to sift through mountains of crap, or move somewhere else. Seein's how I'm just a couple of weeks out of a break-up, I'm okay with the boy scene here. I go out, I have fun, and I don't take anything seriously.

So, this Saturday night when I went to The Picador for an hour or so to see my friends, K. and T., I was a little surprised at a text I received. I had been texting my girls, who were at their dad's. They were both telling me they were home and saying goodnight. I put my phone back in my pocket and felt it vibrating again. When I opened it, the name on the text was Mr. Awesome. (you can read the back issues on him here and here) I was so shocked that I almost dropped my phone. All it said was, "Hello". Now, I've had texts from Mr Awesome a couple of times in the past. One was to apologize and one was to talk shit with me and my friend K. one night when we were out drinking, but I was in a relationship both of those times, so it was just friendly text banter. This time around, it started out as talking shit, but then he got more and more flirty as the night progressed.

At some point during the night, I went back to The Dublin where I was having a dance party and playing songs on the juke box in between texts. Finally, things had escalated and I had enough liquid courage to ask Mr. Awesome what he wanted. He said, whatever I wanted. Then I told him he could drive up here and take me out. He texted back, "Okay". Then I asked him when, and I didn't hear back from him. It was close to bar close at that point anyway, and because of his past behavior, I wasn't surprised.

I gave myself a day or so to figure out what I wanted to do about it. What I decided, was that Mr. Awesome was one of the funniest people I've ever met, and I'm always amused by his drunk texting. I just wanted to make sure that it wasn't going to be any more than that. It's all about expectations with me. So, today I texted him and said something like, "If all you want to do is drunk text me now and then, that's cool. Just so's I know that's all it is."

He texted me back this:

In the process of getting out of a certain situation. Need 2 finalize before any further socializing not including drunk texting. Is that cool smelly butt?

I didn't ask him about his "certain situation", because I don't care. I know, the older people get, the more complicated it becomes to end relationships quickly (especially, if they're living together). I'm glad he told me and I'm glad he wants to make sure its' completely over before he starts anything new. I texted him back this:

Totally. I'm newly single myself. I'm in no hurry. I'm also fine with being friends if that's all you can do.

He responded by saying he thought he'd be out of his "situation" sometime this week. Who knows. I'm happy either way. If anything ever does come of it, at least we're in the same place and I'm sure we'll both want to proceed very slowly and with caution. If it doesn't happen, I'll keep going out and finding fun and I'm sure I'll be getting some hilarious drunken texts in the future. It seems win/win at this point.


Gyuss Baaltar said... and I should totally be texting

dmarks said...

Am I the only one reading this who never has....

evil-e said...

Have fun with it, don't read too much into anything, and enjoy life for the time being. Bask in the lime light!!

I agree that the older, the more difficult it is to end relationships. (I am not ending anything current, speaking from experience) It took me almost two months to get around to ending my last live-in relationship, all the while hating myself for not doing sooner.

Margaret said...

how cute, he called you smelly butt?

Tara said...

I think I've received a few drunk texts myself. They're quite interesting.

DJSassafrass said...

Drunk text flirting...sounds like a good thing to me. Beware the drunk text proposal...oh wait, my BF is probably the only one that does that!

booda baby said...

i'm sure we'll both want to proceed very slowly and with caution. I really need an emoticon for this face of mine. It's sort of :))) and it's sort of the face you make when you want to bap someone gently - with love, with LOVE!

Poptart said...

Interesting development! I loved your last post on Mr. A - you sounded like you were in a really good place in it. If nothing else, he seems to bring out the wisdom, and you deserve the attention!

fringes said...

Mr Awesome wants to feel wanted. For a certain period after his break-up, he may not be so awesome, Churlita.

Not trying to kill your buzz. Sorry for killing your buzz. Ban me if you must.

Churlita said...


Uh huh, and I'm sure your wife would totally be into that.


Never texted? I hadn't until last Summer.


it's tricky to end them when you're older. There are so many other things involved.


He's adorable that way.


Drunk texts crack me up.


You should make a list of all the ways C. had proposed to you.

Booda Baby,

I know, I know...


Eh, I don't know about wisdom, but he's really funny. I meant it when I said I'd be happy just to be friends.


Don't worry about being a buzz kill. I'm very aware of that, which is why I'm not taking it all that seriously. He grew up with my friend K. and she's kind of filled me in on the good and bad of mr Awesome.

Gyuss Baaltar said...

Churlita, she makes me drunken text with other people. She doesn't wanna put up with it. You're doing her a service :)

David in DC said...


Every time someone walks out a door, there are plenty of fish in the sea.

No, wait.

Boys are like trains, and variety is the spice of like.

Well, that's closer.

Here, I've got it:

Broad generalizations are never correct.

Nope, still getting my cliches mangled.

Oh, never mind, I give up.

Enjoy. :)

Churlita said...


It would be hilarious if you drunk texted your wife while she was in the same room with you.


Yeah. Generalizations are generalizations and every situation is unique. I'm not holding my breath for anything, but I'm not writing anything off either. I'm just waiting to see how it all plays out.

another good thing said...

Great attitude. You always make Iowa sound like so much
at least for crazy girls who like to drink and dance and flirt, like me.

Remiman said...

Oh, I guess that's be Mr. Awsome to you.

laura b. said...

Win/win sounds good to me. You deserve some fun! If Mr. Awesome provides some fun then why not let him?

Mrs. Big Hairy Woman said...

I like that he has a pet name for you.. "Smelly Butt", Besides calling him Mr.Awesome what other pet names do you have for him..?

The Lady Who Doesn't Lunch: said...

Brutal honesty counts for a lot in my book - but still I don't envy you in the least being single.

You deserve a really good man I only hope you don't get sick of looking for him. Meanwhile, have fun and don't get a thumb cramp from all that wild texting.

Gyuss Baaltar said...

Dang, how did you know what we do every Saturday night?

NoRegrets said...

well, maybe you could get some good sex at least. or was that the bad in the good and the bad?

Churlita said...


You're always welcome to visit. You'd love it. It's a town full of writers.


Ha ha. Good one.


We'll see what materializes. I'm still on going out and having fun mode.


That's not so much a pet name for me, as him being a dork.


I just figured you two knew how to have good time. That's all.


She doesn't know him on that level. It was more character trait stuff. I do know someone else who could give me details about the other though.

Anonymous said...

Just get a boat.
You will have just as much fun and its a lot simpler to operate than a man. Trust me.


Churlita said...


I don't know how I missed your comment. I'm already tired of looking, but that doesn't mean I'm going to settle. I prefer to just not take anything seriously for a while.

Churlita said...


A boat sounds like just as much maintenance as a man.