The woman who sits in the cubicle next to me at work is really great. She almost makes up for some of the less desirables in my office. She used to be a nun, and left the church for reasons she has never disclosed. She still goes to Abbeys in the area and keeps up with sisters in her old order. At work, when I get bored, I do things, like remind her to make a wish at 11:11 o'clock and ask her all kinds of annoying questions. She is an amazingly patient woman who deserves to be cannonized after sitting next to me for so long. Here's an example of why:
Me: Hey, if you could get off work at noon today, how would you spend the rest of the day?
Her: I'd probably drive to the Abbey and spend the rest of the day there.
Me: So, when you were Christ's bride, did he ever leave his socks all over the house for you to pick up?
Her: (humoring me) I've never seen him wear socks, have you?
Me: No. I guess he's always barefoot or wearing sandals. Did you and the other nuns ever get jealous of each other? You know, like in The Bachelor or Flavor of Love where all those women are always fighting and calling each other names?
Her: I don't know what you're talking about. Are those TV shows or something? And no, we didn't fight. We all knew what we were getting into.
Me: What was the divorce settlement like when you left? I'm assuming you didn't get to keep the house, but did you get some kind of alimony?
Her: No. And I had to buy a whole new wardrobe. I should have shelled-out for a better lawyer.
Me: Could you ever see yourself and Jesus getting back together? Like, if he started coming by and bringing you flowers and taking you out on real dates again?
Her: I would actually love to be a nun again, but they don't accept any after a certain age anymore. You know, I think I'm done with the question and answer portion of the workday. You'll have to wait until tomorrow to ask me more ridiculous questions.
Me: Oh, sorry. I'll just sit here quietly and work on some new ones for tomorrow.
Apparently, even saints have their limits.