Sunday, October 18, 2009

I Bet You Got It All Planned Right

My friend C. was in town from Chicago.

Wow. What a crazy weekend...But good, for the most part. On Friday afternoon, Coadster called me to say she wasn't really into going to the football game and wondered if I was going to be home, because she wanted to hang out and watch movies with me. Awesome. That's all I needed to hear. I never take it for granted when my 17 year old wants to hang out with me.

We watched Adventureland. It takes place in 1987, so Coadster kept asking me if people talked like that back then or listened to that kind of music or whatever. I wasn't always all that helpful. I was in college in 1987, so my memory of that year is a little hazy.

G. and fun kids from the conference.

Saturday was almost as blurry as 1987 is for me. After we got back from Ottumwa, I dropped Coadster off at her babysitting gig and Stinky off at her friend's house. I stopped at the cookout for a minute. The guy I took as my date to my friend's R and E.'s wedding last year was in town for the bike ride and cookout, and I hadn't seen him in forever. Of course, I was there for about a half hour before G. called and a woman, C. who was in town for the weekend called me right after that. So, I didn't get to talk to him for very long, but it was nice to catch up a little.

I picked up G. and D. and headed for the Dublin. There was a conference in town for a particular academic area of interest, and all the people from it came down to the bar. Some of them were playing pool and one of the girls looked really familiar. I couldn't quite place her, so I didn't say anything, but then G. came up to me and said, "Hey, that girl M. says she works with you." Doh! I felt so rude. I went right over and apologized to her for not saying hi, but she was super cool about it. One of the guys she was with started talking to me. He was also with his "it's complicated" girlfriend (his words). He talked about what he did and where he was from and asked me where I was from. I never know how to answer that, so I said I went to high school in Ottumwa.

"Oh, do you know our friend, S? She's from Ottumwa..."

"Um. I doubt it. She's probably a lot younger than me."

"No. She's in her late 20's," he said. I'm sure to him, that seemed really old.

"Yes, well. I'm much older than that."

"How about 'some guys name I can't remember'? He's like 36..." I assured him I was even older than that. He then started talking about his relationship with his girl in intimate detail, very loudly and right in front of her.

"I'm not sure you want to go into all that detail with someone you don't even know..." I said.

"No. You're exactly who I want to tell all this to. Since I don't know you, it's perfect...And you're wise."

"I wouldn't go assuming I'm wise, just because I'm old. I make more mistakes than anyone." (my new mantra)

"Are you married?" He asked.

"Nope. I'm divorced. See what I mean? Another mistake."

"I don't care. I want to talk to you about it anyway," he said and went into his whole history with his "it's complicated girl". That woman didn't seem to mind either. She listened for a minute and said she was going to some party and took off.

As I've said before, a lot of my girlfriends talk to me when they are having boy problems, but I don't seem to have a lot of male friends who are all that open about their relationships that way. It was actually very refreshing. Mostly, his girly was pushing him away, and then pulling him back over and over again. I didn't try to tell him what to do, I just listened and told him I understood how confusing and frustrating that could be. After he got it all out, I told him I had to go home so I could get up early and run. Then we did that thing that people do in this day and age: We said we'd friend each other on Facebook and I promised to tag him in the photos.

Triathlon Training:

I ran 34.1 miles this week. No biking. No swimming.

10 comments:

laura b. said...

I have been wanting to see Adventureland! I think it is on my netflix queue.

What is it like to be called wise? Or be thought you're in your 20's? Not familiar with either of those things, but sounds good!

Remiman said...

Churlita,
Ok, since you like hearing about girl problems from guys, here goes:


Had enough?
Good, cause that's all I got! ;>)

Glad you had a good weekend!
rel

p.s. You're young, I'm old. :)

Pamela said...

It is indeed weird when boys want to talk it out... hard not to do what they do and try and fix it.

Tara said...

A former coworker used to tell me in detail about her sex life with her boyfriend. I tried not to picture anything.

I don't get the "it's complicated" statuses. Either they're in a relationship or they're not, they need to make up their minds. It's also like Match.com profiles where it asks someone their status like Single, Divorced, etc. Some guys leave that blank.

booda baby said...

Probably because I've had so many close men friends, but I've actually found them more than capable/eager to talk about relationships. I always liked talking with them because it wasn't so much details as how they thought about things or perceived things. Women, bless our hearts, will mine every itsy bitsy inflection. And then repeat ourselves twenty times. Ha. :)

Susan said...

Sounds like a good weekend to me!

Ananda girl said...

You have such interesting situations come up. I don't know what I would have done with that guy... it would have freaked me out that he wanted to talk about her in front of her. I do not get that!

The rest of your weekend sounds great to me. BTW... I think a lot of what you say is wise.

AlienCG said...

I tend to be a magnet for people who have problems. They all want to tell me, and I could care less.

All in all, it sounds like you had a good weekend.

Mnmom said...

I always tell guys like him to "shit or get off the pot".

Churlita said...

Laura,

It's pretty fun. The nostalgia factor alone is great.

He just said I was wise because he didn't know me. And I think in his world 30 is as old as it gets, so it probably wasn't all that much of a compliment.

Rel,

Yeah. That's what I thought. :)

Pamela,

It was weird but nice. As I've said before, I have no idea why guys do what they do, so the insight was good.

Tara,

He went into that too. That's when I told him I might not be the person to tell that to.

His girlfriend was the one who wanted it to be "it's complicated". That's why he was so frustrated. He was really into her.

Booda Baby,

I have a lot of close male friends too, but most of them seem to have a hard time admitting to any feelings other than anger. Maybe that's just an Iowa guy thing...I guess I have a couple of guy friends who are more open, but not many.

Susan,

It was a good weekend.

Ananda,

It seemed like a mixture of frustration and beer. She really didn't seem to mind at all that he was being so open about their relationship to me. So, it didn't feel all that uncomfortable.

AlienCG,

I do care. Which is probably why people want to tell me. If I could make everyone happy and comfortable and sane, I would.

MnMom,

Though, it was his girlfriend who needed to shit or get off the pot. he was the one who wanted to be in a committed relationship and she didn't seem to know what she wanted.