Another night where I'm only capable of random thoughts:
1.) I think Blogger, as my brother-in-law says, is eight-tracking me. I haven't switched to Beta yet, because change is bad and I suck at computer-y things. I know others who had problems with their templates during the transition and I really don't need any new frustrations in my life right now. Lately, though, Blogger hasn't been letting me comment on many Beta blogs, so I guess this weekend, I'll have to invite a completely new and different frustration into my life and finally switch over. If I haven't been commenting on your blog and you have Beta, I'm sorry, but now you know why.
2.) I've been very busy and stressed out about not having any time or money. Then tonight, I fuck with myself even more by burning a pan of brown rice and spilling half a box of cereal all over the kitchen floor. So, now I have even less time and money and I'm feeling really guilty about wasting food. That'll learn me.
3.) My work Christmas party is tomorrow. In the past we were given the option to attend, or take off for two hours. Since I spend way more time with my co-workers than my family or by myself, I have always chosen to walk home and wash dishes and hang-out by myself while the girls were at school. Sadly, an hour alone to clean is many a single mom's fantasy. This year, I was informed that the party was not optional. Whatever. We're also supposed to bring a potluck item, and since I've been busy wasting my food and making new messes to clean-up, I don't have the energy or inclination to cook for a party I don't want to attend anyway. My boss told me I didn't have to bring anything, I just had to go. This is just the kind of thing that sends my self-diagnosed Oppositional Defiance Disorder spiraling out of control.
4.) This weekend while my friend S. was in town, she thought we should take some time to find me a new imaginary boyfriend. I was open to it, because when it isn't pathetic and sad, it can sometimes be fun to have a crush on someone. We didn't have much luck this weekend, but my eyes are still open. This time, instead of crushing out on someone I feel I would actually be compatible with, I've decided to go completely the other way. I just think the rejection will be easier to stomach if it's by someone way younger, hotter and completely wrong for me.