Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Don't Have a Window to Slip Out Of

I took this with my phone and no flash on my way home from work. She seemed a little frantic looking, but maybe she's stressing about the cold temps descending upon us again.

So, here's how it all went down today. I finally got a call from the school. The guy said he had Stinky and the punching girl sit in a room together and talk things out. What?! I was pissed. I didn't think that was a safe situation for Stinky and I also think that "talking it out" implies that Stinky had some culpability in it. Believe me, I'm all about keeping my kids accountable for their actions. But it was clear from all accounts and video footage that Stinky didn't even defend herself. Stinky said they sat there by themselves not saying anything until Stinky apologized. I asked her why she apologized and she said she was scared that if she didn't, it would start all over again. I told the guy I wasn't happy with his treatment of the incident. He told me the puncher girl received some disciplinary action that he wasn't at liberty to tell me. Of course, all the kids at school were talking about it, so I found out that she got 3 days of suspension (2 of them were in-school).

I guess the real punishment for the puncher girl is that all the kids at school are shunning her and talking shit about her. Maybe that will help redirect her behavior in the future. I've heard tell that some boy got the last few minutes of the attack on video with his phone. I know I couldn't watch it. It would make me too sad and angry at the same to watch someone hurting my daughter.

Okay. I hate drama. I can't stand conflict and violence. I had to experience enough of it by the time I was 18 to last me the rest of my life and all of yours, so I'm leaving that all behind now. Of course, I'm monitoring the situation as closely as I can, in case the puncher girl has another flare-up, though.

On another note. I think I'm ready to start my cupboard project. I over-researched it, went to Menard's to get a few more things to help me with it, and now all I have to do is get cracking. I'm taking the doors off and finishing the boxes first. I've heard it's messy and time consuming, so I'm going to gear-up and prep as much as I can before the weekend so I can finish it by Sunday. We'll see how that goes....


laura b. said...

Ugh. That is just wrong, wrong, wrong. But it sounds like you want to move on, so let me do that.

I am in awe of the amount of work you've already put into your place! The cupboard project sounds big, but in a good way...it will have a major impact on the use and appearance of your kitchen. Keep us updated and give us some photos as you go along!

rel said...

Trying to impose a win/win resolution is a commendable ambition, but I wonder what their success rate is, knowing human nature. Hopeful that Stinky is out of the puncher's sights for now.
I remember doing kitchen cupboards; That will keep you occupied!

Tara said...

That principle sounds like a teacher I once had in high school. His whole class was based on confronting our fears and enemies, and he had two girls "talk it out" in class. It was all weird.

NoRegrets said...

Can you bottle your unlimitedless energy and sell it to me?

Mnmom said...

That is wrong. Stinky was assaulted. If that principal had been assaulted at work by a corworker, they wouldn't be asked to sit in a room and "talk it out". The Perp would be in jail charged with assault.
I would make some noise on this one. Your daughter was the victim of a serious crime. Not some minor incident.

A said...

The principal left the two alone in a room to talk?
Have you considered calling the superintendent or Iowa City Police Department?
That is the worst handling of a violent incident in a school setting I have ever heard of -
I'd make a fuss

booda baby said...

WHAT?! WHAT?!??!


Stinky, on the other hand, handled it with great aplomb. I'm sorry she was motivated by fear, but her choice of weapons/negotiating tools was inspired.

Churlita said...


I think so too. I'm still thinking about what to do. I have a friend who is a lawyer, so I'm going to check with her before I act.

I hope she is too. And I'm sure those cupboards will keep me busier than I want to be for a while.

Tara, Talking it out might have been okay before things escalated, but afterward, is just dumb, and not safe for Stinky.

Nor, I would in a second if it meant I could sleep better at night.

MnMom, He told my ex husband that the girl just slapped her, if that was nothing. When in fact she punched Stinky 3 times in the face. You just couldn't see it on the tape because there were so many boys in the way trying to pull the girl off of Stinky. It's maddening.


I know. I'm considering a couple of options right now and will decide this weekend.

Booda Baby,

I'm just worried that Stinky will learn to be a door mat from this incident which is not at all what I want. We're talking about it a lot and it sounds like she's probably emotionally healthier about than I am.

Mrs. Hairy Woman said...

That is typical of the school to NOT tell you what the punishment is..Not that it mattered because you found out.. Still that is soooo wrong.. Go to the school board.. It was a very lucky thing that the camera got the footage.. in an unprovoked attack like that.. Poor Stinky.. I hope Puncher Girl gets what is coming .. what is it that you are going to do with your cupboards? Make sure you take before and after pics to post..