Summer Reading, Had Me a Blast.

Well, kids. It's almost October, so I better get crackin' on my August books post.

In August I took six book trips, and I went to some fantastic places.

1.) My first jaunt was to Turkey and Syria via Elliot Ackerman's "Dark at the Crossing". It was a very sad book. It was also the first novel I've read about what's been going on in Syria the last few years.

2.) My second trip was a non-fiction book by Mary Karr called "The Liar's Club" about her childhood in a very dysfunctional family. It was a trip back to the 60's and early 70's in Texas and Colorado. It was very well written as well.

3.) My third adventure involved trolls and changelings in modern day NYC. I really liked this novel a lot. It was "The Changeling" by Victor Lavalle.

4.) My fourth book has been getting tons of hype this Summer. "Where the Crawdads Sings" by Delia Owens was a perfect Summer read. It takes place in North Carolina and is about a girl who was basically abandoned by her family members when she was very young and how that has shaped her as an adult. If you want a very escapist, read, this is your novel.

5.) I traveled to a part of England in "Elmet", by Fiona Mozley. This book was in keeping with my theme during August of brutal allegory/fantasy texts. The world in this novel felt dreamlike and then later turned into a nightmare.

6.) What a way to end my month in book travel. My sixth book was "The Fellowship of the Ring" by J. R. R. Tolkien. I don't think I ever read the trilogy when I was a kid, and I wanted to wait a while after having watched the movies to dig into it, but man, what a voyage. My daughter tells me the other ones get more boring, however. I just loved the novel and it was another perfect Summer read.

Now that the sun light seems to be getting weaker and setting earlier, it will be interesting to see how my book travel changes.

And the Soles of Your Shoes Are All Worn Down

I've been trying to write this post for the last couple of weeks, but our internet at home is spotty, and we've been busy at work. So, I'm not updating this post again, or I'll never publish this thing: 

Okay. So, I've been having migraines on and off now for three weeks and it's hard to make my brain work well enough to write anything ground breaking, or all that interesting. I'm taking the next two days off for the Trek World Cup Cyclocross race. I probably won't be able to race at all, since I'm so weak and dizzy from stupid migraines. John will race all three days and we'll be in Madison for almost four days.

Last Thursday I had my third year post breast cancer mammogram. I went in the morning and had my mammogram and then met with the oncologist nurse practitioner who told me that my preliminary report was clean. Yea me!

Oh, old lady health issues, I'm a little annoyed with you all. Speaking of old lady health issues, I've been reading this very long, but very informative article about the link between Alzheimer's and menopause here: https://medium.com/neurotrack/menopause-and-alzheimers-1c455f29fe16. Of course, Alzheimer's doesn't seem to run in my family...Or maybe it does, but everyone in my family tends to smoke so much that they die of cancer or strokes or heart attacks, and they don't live long enough to find out if it runs in our family or not.

Anyway, this woman proposes that there is a strong link to menopause and Alzheimer's in women. Basically, they think women start getting Alzheimer's right when they hit menopause. Great. The woman says you can keep this from happening by avoiding, alcohol, sugar, caffeine, processed food, and stress. Excuse me, but how are we supposed to deal with our stress when we have to avoid alcohol, sugar, caffeine, and processed food?

Soooo, I'm working hard to eat better, even though perimenopause makes me crave sugar and stresses me out, making that way more of a challenge than it should be. I suppose the good thing about getting Alzheimer's with my menopause, will be forgetting what perimenopause felt like. Hot flashes? What are those? Migraines? I can't really recall that pain. Crying for no reason? When did that happen? Gaining weight by just looking at food? Haven't I always weighed this much? Maybe I shouldn't work so hard at eating better and avoiding alcohol after all...

Let Me Drown in Your Laughter. Let Me Die in Your Arms

Last night I had a dream that John Denver was still alive and looked like he did in the 70's and he wanted to meet me after his (well attended concert - which should have clued me in that it was a dream).

Anyway, the dream seemed to go on for hours and hours and all it was, was me wanting to meet John Denver for a date after his show, but blowing him off for my husband and being conflicted and then having John Denver give me another chance to meet him, and then me flaking on him, and so on and so on, and right when it seemed that I would finally leave my spouse to be with John Denver, I woke up and felt awful about choosing him over my husband. Where the hell did THAT dream come from?

All I can say, is that if I had that dream when I was 10 years old, it would have been a lot shorter. I would have left any husband I had to be with John Denver without a drop of guilt. I guess maybe I have matured a little now that I'm in my 50's.

Also, I'm blaming my now 7 day migraine for all of this. Who knows what weird doors all that pain has opened up in my brain. I might totally revert back to my mid-seventies self and start wearing smock tops and earth shoes, and listening to Olivia Newton-John and watching "The Waltons". It's a slippery slope.

I Used to Get Mad at My School (No, I Can't Complain). The Teachers Who Taught Me Weren't Cool (No, I Can't Complain).

 Time for a recycled post:


 When I was in 4th grade, I was desperately trying to get diagnosed with a learning disability. Both my brother and my sister supposedly had one and they got to see Mrs. Sanchez. She was a big proponent of positive reinforcement, so my siblings were constantly coming home with super balls, candy and best of all, stories about their lunches at McDonald's. Back in 1974, you were still allowed to use food as a reward. My plan was to get diagnosed, have my class in Mrs. Sanchez's room and then be so good that I used up her entire budget on McDonald's lunches every week. The school indulged me a couple of times, but the third time I asked to take the test that should have led me down my Mccheeseburger path, I was denied.

I don't remember specifics, but I think the principal sounded like this; "Listen kid. You don't have a learning disability and you're not gonna get one by taking the tests over and over. So, scram." Actually, it was the seventies and we lived in Mesa so I'm sure he spoke less like Nick the bartender from It's A Wonderful Life and more like a progressive Mormon worried about my self-esteem.

What I lacked in a learning disability, I made up for in a speech impediment. I had a lisp up until that year. Lisps are adorable until you reach that awkward age and unless you're moving to Barcelona, you want to try to lose it and fast. Which meant I had to meet with a speech therapist. Unfortunately, she was no Mrs. Sanchez. She was so boring, I don't even remember her name. I sat in her room and recited, "Sammy snake, Sammy snake, Sammy snake..." into a tape recorder.

I know I can't make it through a post without mentioning my short attention span, so I figured I'd bring it up again. Sitting down for very long is difficult for me as an adult, but as a nine year old, it was torture. Finally, one day my teacher went out and left me to my recitation so she could smoke a ciggie in the hallway and chat with some of the other teachers. I continued on and she told me she would listen to it later. Halfway through, I belched very loudly into the microphone. I felt so rebellious. But instead of listening to the tape later, my speech therapist came back early and decided to go over it with me. I couldn't look at her as the tape rolled on. "Sammy snake. Sammy snake. Sammy snake. Bwaaap! Sammy snake..." My teacher was sufficently horrified.

"Chur-LEE-ta!" I was so busted. I didn't even laugh uncomfortably like I normally do in awkward situations.

"I'm sorry, but it was soooo boring." She wasn't sympathetic. She was, in fact, very annoyed for the duration of our classes together. I once heard her relating the incident to another teacher when they were standing outside the door. The other teacher said,

"I guess there's one in every bunch..."

The good news is, that I lost my lisp that year. Maybe the therapist had a plan all along. Her strategy was to bore the lisp right out of me. And now I don't even have to consciously think to put my tongue behind my teeth when I say Sammy snake. Which is good, because you know how often I'm always talking about Sammy snake.