On Friday I got some good news. I went for my breast cancer check-up and mammogram and everything looked fine. My surgical oncologist said that I shouldn't have to meet with her again, unless my situation changed and so after two years, things are looking up.
Of course, I was a little scared the few days before. I know that was stupid. My breast ultrasound was fine in February and that is more sensitive than a mammogram, but sometimes I can't help but worry. I've gotten much better about not doing that. You know that thing. When I was younger I used to create all of these bizarre scenarios in my head. The bad kind where you imagine the worst possible thing that could happen and then you try to imagine how you'll react. I used to think that by doing that, I would be prepared for anything that would come my way. It was so dumb. What I really did was make something happen in my head, when half the time it never occurred in my real life, and when bad things did happen, they were never like I imagined them.
So, now every once in a while I worry and create stupid scenarios in my head, but generally, I try not to obsess on what bad things could happen, but instead put all my energy in what is really go on right now. It isn't always an easy thing to do...
1 comment:
It's funny - it's only recently that I've mostly given up on the worse case scenario thinking. I used to think it was useful, but yes, it's not.
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