It Seems Like This Whole Town's Insane

This tag was from a wall by the Golden Gate Bridge. Apparently done by a San Francisco native.

It's another one of my, "It's late and I'm tired posts". I worked on an old timey country/bluegrass CD for my friend K. tonight. I'll put the playlist up on the blog one of these days soon here. Even if you don't know a lot of bluegrass, there are also a few trucker hits and a cowboy song, and some of the blugress songs are covers of songs you might know. I had to import a lot of my bluegrass CD's and then I decided to load my iTunes up with some other CD's I had while I was at it. So, I kind of screwed myself over for blog time tonight.

This was a leftover wall painting from the Olympics. Coadster was obsessed with finding any remnants from the Salt Lake City Olympics while we were there.

Which means you all get a mostly photo post tonight and some random ramblings about whatever enters my pea sized brain. (I almost spelled: brian - just so you know what you're dealing with tonight)

I decided to dip into my vacation pics again and pull out any photos I could find of my favorite kind of art - low art. I'm still working on that one painting and it's supposed to be a bit murally, and comic booky and graffiti-like and since it has taken me two years to really get going on it, I've had plenty of time to collect photographic examples of what I'm going for.


This mural was a side part of the mural below this. It was so big that Stinky had to photograph it in parts.

The wedding date guy drunk texted me on Saturday night. I hadn't heard from him since the text non-break-up, so it was kind of surprising. The first text was long and similar to what someone might write in your yearbook your senior year in high school. He basically said that he was glad he got to know me and that he wanted me to be me (?) and that we had to stay friends. I was tempted to write back, "It was really fun sitting by you in study hall. Don't ever change. I hope we see each other at keggers at the Lagoons after graduation." But I was good. I knew he was drunk and just wanted attention from someone of the opposite sex. We've all been there. I texted something about having had a great Summer with him and that I would always be his friend. Which was all true.

This was the main part of the mural. There were all kinds of groovy famous people painted within this one and the girls tried to identify all of them. Yes, we are dorks. What's it to ya?

I'm going to try really hard to remember to bring my camera to work tomorrow. Today there was a group of god people holding these GIGANTIC signs about how we all suck and we're all sinners and blah, blah, blah. These particular zealots, all seemed to be very attractive college aged kids. So, I was walking across campus toward the bank to drop off the work deposit, when some young buck tried to hand me his pamphlet. I politely declined it. Then he said, "You need to repent, ma'am. You're hopelessly lost."

I wanted to say, "Listen Buster Brown. If you call me 'ma'am' one more time, I'll make you repent." But once again, I was good and kept it to myself. People who know me, will be shocked to learn that I do indeed have a filter. I just forget to use it most of the time.

You Always Keep Me Guessin'

My favorite bartender S.'s wife is an amazing ceramics artist. She made this piece and the one below for my friend Libby.

So, when I got home on Saturday night, I started getting texts from an unknown number. The first one said:

Churlita I hear yr HOT!!!!!!

There are a few boys who drunk text me, and I figured it was one of them using a friend's phone to mess with me, but I didn't want to venture a guess, in case it was the wrong boy. So, this is how I responded:

Me: Who the hell is this?

Them: Does it matter?

Me: Yes it does. Would it matter 2 u? Don't u wanna know whos heard yr hot?

Them: No. I'd b curious.

Me: Me 2. I'm assuming someone I know is messing with me thru u. So who is it?

Them: Someone!

Me: Um duh. Where's a 402 area code from anyway? I have my suspicions but I still feel like Drew Barrymore at the beginning of the movie Scream.

Them: Kind of creepy but you feel hor.

Them: Opps. Hot.

At this point, I was pretty sure I knew who it was. One of the boys who texts me is notorious for text typos and he always writes opps, instead of oops. I was still getting annoyed that he wouldn't come clean. Especially since, in the middle of this, he texted me from his own phone, so I wouldn't think it was him.

Me: Yeah it is creepy but more hot than hor, thx. Ok. Enough bullshit. Who gave u my number. I'm sure they're right there with u.

Them: U r very curious.

Me: U would b 2. Again its getting a little creepy 4 me.

I was pretty much done with the texting, and I think he figured he'd gone further than he should with it, so the guy who I thought it was called me. The weirdest thing about the phone call, is that we talked for about an hour, and neither one of us brought up the dorky texting incident. He didn't own up to it, and I didn't ask him. I didn't bring it up because I knew he was just trying to be funny, and then didn't quite know how to end it once he realized it had gone too far. It was definitely an interesting way to end my Saturday night, but if he ever does it again, I'll make like Barney Fife and nip it in the bud.

Libby calls the top one goosey and the bottom one goatie. Of course.

Life's Such a Treat and It's Time You Taste It

Here's a picture of Libby's dog, licking it up.

Well, kids. It's the end of my glorious three day weekend and I'm trying to clean things up and get ready for the work day. What that means for all y'all, is that I'm posting some texts I've either sent or received before I delete them. If you've read one of these kinds of posts before, you'll recall that it's usually dirty and wrong and less attractive than Kiss without their make-up in the "Lick it Up" video. Remember, unless they're grouped together, these texts stand on their own and aren't attached to the one above or below. Ready? Okay!

1) Maybe he'll be back. Sometimes that happens and you wind up shaving in the Dublin bathroom! I might be back. S. keeps farting by me.


2.) He's makin tatr salad n chickn. So anything.


3.)This is an exchange.

1st Texter: Grassy Ass.

2nd texter: I love it when u speak Iowa Spanish.

1st texter: It makes me seem hotter don't u think?


4.) I have 20 new boyfriends. It must be bar close.


5.) Spayshul! U got cute boyz movin in next door.


6.) Good. I meant every word. Even if I did sound like Corky from "Life Goes On."


7.) This next exchange was the day after a drunk text from a boy at bar close who lives 5 hours from me and told me he was going to start driving to see me. After I reminded him that he probably was too drunk to drive, he told me he'd try to drive down the next day. I got this the next afternoon when he woke up with a belly full of shame:

Him: Needless to say but I won't be making it tonight. I'm hoping for a longer stay in the very near future. Promise.

Me: Ha ha. I kept waiting for you to get here 5 hours after u texted. Just kidding.

Him: I know u did... Liar.


8.) U were sexxxy with 3 xs.


9.) What's up douche?


10.) 1st texter: GW gave me shit that most of those pics were of u n me but she took most of them so I flipped that shit right back at her.

2nd texter: Ha ha! its not our fault that our dance moves are mesmerizing.


11.) I'll let u know when to start feeling shame - u've got a lot of making up to do in the slut arena. better do it now rathr than in the nursing home.


12.) I'm like a Paris Hilton porno shot in night vision in those pics. Ugh.

Right, Wrong, They Just Can't Stop It

Here are some pretty Spring flowers for you. It's the least I can do if you're going to be nice enough to try to read this post.

I forgot to tell you all how Stinky did at State. She got 19th in discus and 14th place in shot put. Her team got second place. Not too shabby, eh?

I think I'm going to talk a little more about texting tonight. It seems people have strong opinions about it. I know a guy who refuses to read or answer any texts he receives and I have a friend who thinks it's souless. Personally, I love it. I really don't like talking on the phone. As I've said a million times before, I take phone calls all day at work, plus I'm just not good on the phone. I don't know if it's because I can't see how the person is reacting, or what the problem is, but I babble too much and ask too many annoying questions because I'm afraid of any empty space over the lines. Anyway, texting is perfect for me. It's short and to the point. I can dash off a thought and send it through without really any commitment...Just the way I like it.

Texting is also perfect for me and the girls. I can text ask them what they want from the store, and they can text answer me without having to walk around the store with the phone affixed to my head and speaking too loudly in public as I'm wont to do.

Of course, I've had few interesting experiences with drunk texting and both my friend K. and I have stopped in mid-text before when we were trying to communicate to each other that way one messy evening. Flirty texting is perfect for me some nights when I'm at a bar and not all that attracted to any guys in my vicinity, but I still want attention. I have a friend I use just for that occasion. Like I've told my friend K., he's like a fuck buddy without the sex.

In honor of my post tonight. I'll put up a few text interactions between myself and others, just for those who don't text, so they can see how truly ridiculous and dorky it can be, and probably never ever want to start. Unless specified, each number stands by itself.

1.) Sittin' on the couch. Probly still be here in 15 in the same position.


2.) Goobie Goob! We're @ The Picador. Where's your screechy boyfriend?


3.) He's as predictable as a Brady Bunch episode.


4.) (sent text) Why do I have the Knight Rider theme song in my head? Please shoot me.

(response) BANG!!!


5.) (text I received and then forwarded to another friend to read) M. want to hang out with you and hold hands like eighth graders.

(friend's response) What? Is M. a caveman now?


6.) I love Olivia Newton John!


7.) First Texter: Send me a pic of yr abs.

Second Texter: You send me a pic of yr abs first.

First Texter: Abs? What abs? How bout a pic of my elbows?


8.) (Another bizarre drunken exchange) First Texter: If you like watching guys taking showers, u should really meet my mom.

Second Texter: What if I just want 2 watch u take a shower? Do I still need to meet yr mom?

First Texter: As long as u r down with jesus.

Second Texter: Can't you tell by all the dirty texts I send u?

First Texter: Ya. Yr a regular christian camp counselor.

Well They're the People That You Meet When You're Walking Down the Street

Here's me being obnoxious and sticking my tongue out at you. Now there's something you don't see every day...Or maybe it is.

I was sitting around pondering what to write about tonight. It's Tuesday and I gave myself a night to relax, since for the next two weeks I should be running around like a crazy(er) person. I was kicking around the idea of writing about the dangers of texting, because Coadster told me one of her friends was texting a boy she liked and accidentally sent him a text that was intended for her girlfriend where she gushed about how excited she was to be texting said boy. I also wanted to say that I RSVP'ed my friend Libby's husband R.'s 40th birthday party with this:

Hey there honey bunches of oats. I'm officially RSVP'ing for the bowling party on the 16th. I checked with my daughter, and for some reason she doesn't want to hang out with her mommy on her 16th birthday party. Who knew? Apparently, though, I am allowed to give her money so she can party with her friends. Awesome.

I will warn you that I haven't bowled since junior high, so the comic factor should be really high.

Okay. See you at the alley.

Churlita

She responded thusly:

I love you.

Which made my extremely boring day at work that much better. If you knew Libby, you would totally understand. I run into her sometimes in the mornings when I'm on my way to work and she's walking her dogs. When I ask her how she is, she always responds with, "I'm just a little bit better than everyone else." And it really is true. Oh, and she swears a lot. See? Now you can like her too.

So, I guess that's all I've got to say in this post. Feel free to tell me about one of your favorite people in the comments.